I know I'm supposed to post a new Christmas song today to keep things neat and orderly. I like neat and orderly - everything as it should be and out of mind. But I just can't. I don't feel neat and orderly. I feel dead and worn down. And I'm not even taking finals like most people I know. My roommate/landlord just sent me an email for a $112 utility bill this month, NOT split, and now that the anger has passed (I'm really only here half the week, while he sits here with all the lights on all day) I just want to lie on my bed and be emo and listen to The Mountain Goats. This music heals me in an inexplicable way. I know John Darnielle's voice is whiney and more talking than singing anyway. It's the way he lets small things touch his heart. I need people and influences in my life like that.
I miss having friends.
I miss George.
I miss Sarah.
I miss Emily.
I miss Brittany.
I miss Eric.
I miss riding my bike.
I miss $585 rent.
I miss Amy.
I miss Faith.
I miss Lana.
I miss Stephen.
I miss Arlo.
I miss my family and anyone I didn't mention yet, except for ex-boyfriends.
I miss feeling comfortable.
The Mountain Goats, "Woke Up New"
