Thursday, February 28, 2008

I Should Have Paid Attention to More Disney Movies' Morals

Tonight I was looking at an eco-entertainment website that wanted writers (unpaid, of course) and I mentally sighed, thinking about how if I were to apply, first to make sure I was qualified I would have to start reading some similar blogs to get caught up on the latest "green" styles, celebrity news, etc.

There's something wrong there.

Ideally, instead of trying to figure out what I can do to fit into a required bracket, shouldn't I be pursuing what makes me happy and makes sense to me? And then if something comes along that fits my qualifications, all the better. There are so many jobs I've applied to where the interviewers made me feel inadequate for not matching certain specifications. There was the website that wanted someone with a stronger "craft" background; the stationary company that wanted someone with a stronger sales background, the website and the box office that wanted someone with more applicable experience. And I often feel that if I learned more about the "craft" movement, for instance - started reading all the blogs, knitting, bought a sewing maching, doing whatever else crafters do, I would have the job.

Even more painful is the regret that if I were somehow different - if I'd been interested in sports or hadn't used that choice of words - I would not have lost someone I loved. I know it sounds cliche, but is there every any value in adjusting yourself to a certain type of role - whether it's in a relationship or trying to find a job? And how long can you keep it up?

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Text Adventure

I don't normally like this lyric-less, dreamy "mid-fi bedroom pop" music, but Text Adventure - a Glasgow-based two man outfit - has caught my attention lately. I've had their song "Boobook (for R)" on my itunes for a while after some music blog hyped them, and it's a really beautiful warm bittersweet nostalgic instrumental song. I'm out of adjectives, you'll have to listen to it yourself.


Check out their Myspace for a couple free downloads (or add them - the poor lads only have 22 friends!). You can also search for them on Hype Machine - it scours mp3s recently posted on music blogs.

...Just Look for Cars First

I have lost friends - some by death...others through sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf

I ducked inside a toy store in Yerba Buena to escape the pouring rain this afternoon, and saw a Virginia Woolf finger puppet with this quote. As soon as I had finished wondering why someone would buy a Virginia Woolf finger puppet, the quote sank in as especially true.

Please keep in touch. You know I will.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Busy Backson

My mom might be the only one who gets that title, but it's from a Winnie the Pooh story if my memory serves me correctly. Just one of those stupid phrases that becomes ingrained in a family's vocabulary until it's almost meaningless.

After three interviews, errands, hours on public transportation, securing a "date" for my friend's wedding (thanks, Emily), and the typical mental anguish of a day in this city, I'm exhausted.

On my adventures I discovered something strange and amazing: a map vending machine at the AAA office. For months I've been wandering aimlessly or driving aimlessly, never remembering to pick up free city maps from AAA until I make a wrong turn and end up at Union Square when I'm looking for a store in the Marina. I finally remembered today and expected to walk into a AAA and be handed maps by an employee. Instead (I'm still gobsmacked by the idea) right inside the door was a machine you would typically expect to purchase a $1.25 bag of M&Ms from - filled with maps! AAA members need simply insert their membership card, select as many maps as needed by pressing A5 or D2 and the little wires uncoil to deposit a brand spanking new map.

I've noticed bizarre vending machines popping up all over the city lately. There's one that sells expensive perfumes in the mall in the hallway to BART, one that sells iPods and their various accessories in the Metreon center, and supposedly one that sells marijuana - I'll post a picture of if I ever find it.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Single Awareness? You're Not Alone


Last night as I sat at the airport reading about the horrific botched attempt at the first electrical execution, my mind wandered to another form of cruel and unusual punishment: relationships.

People have some pretty strong views about Valentine's Day. If it isn't complaining about how this day has been hijacked by Hallmark and Hershey's, it's berating Valentine's Day as just another day where couples can gloat over how wonderful life is as a unit. I admit I have often been a part of the faction giving voice to how lame Valentine's Day is, but the truth is I don't hate it as much as I've claimed.

Growing up, Valentine's Day was never about a boy. Maybe it's because I wasn't in school, exchanging valentines in class and worrying about who I would give a Carebear or Ninja Turtles card to. I never even had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day until I was twenty. When I was young, the days before Valentine's Day were spent in the laundry room with paper doilies, feathers, stickers, colored markers, glitter, paper, and glue - making valentines for my family and relatives - or helping my mom bake heart-shaped cookies. That morning or the night before, we'd sneak down and place our valentines at each family member's place at the table - to be discovered at breakfast.

Romantic love, with a lower-case r, is fine, but it's just one of the facets (and in my opinion one of the most superficial aspects) of what Valentine's Day means to me. What about the love of family? The love of friends? Both are sadly ignored by the public perception of the holiday. Saint Valentine's name is derived from the Latin valens, worthy. Are friends and family less worthy of a day of celebration than a significant other?

To me, this is the truest love. The brother who can hardly wait for me to get home so he can show me the song he recorded on his new keyboard, holding the newborn cousin with a head as small and delicate as a peach, the dog who curls up next to me on the couch. Valentine's Day is about the fact that I have the ability to give love, to feel love.

I won't get flowers this Valentine's Day, but I have so innumerably much more.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

How Can You Read This? It Has No Pictures!

Intoxicated with that fact that with a click of a button I can order materials from any branch of the San Francisco library system to be delivered to the library at the bottom of my street, I requested books like crazy online. So now here I am, like a college student who doesn't understand how credit works. It was so easy to order all these books, but now I have to acknowledge the fact that I'll probably never get to them all. These books are like another stray to a cat lady or a child to Angelina Jolie. Putting my gluttonous behaviors aside, I can't read them all. As it is, there are books I've been working on since last summer.

1. Les Miserables, Victor Hugo. I'm on page 1180 out of 1463 and for the last dozen pages Hugo has been talking about not only the barricades built between the Rue de la Chanvrerie, but every barricade built in the city of Paris since then - their size, composition, etc.

2. One Hundred Years of Solitude, Gabriel Garcia Marquez. I haven't read this in so long I forget what it was about...besides the fact that everyone has the same name...

3. Reading Lolita in Tehran, Azar Nafisi. A wonderful book I got for Christmas about a group of girls who meet secretly to discuss banned books and life. I bet Oprah loves it.

4. Empires of Light by Jill Jonnes. The late 19th century has to be one of my favorite time periods ever. Combine that with a fascinating look at the evolution of electricity, and it's a recipe for Haley reading on the Muni. Plus, George Westinghouse was a hottie.

5. Proust and the Squid by Maryanne Wolf. I just got this one from the library and read the prologue, but I've been itching to read it ever since I saw it at Borders. It's a look at how the brain has actually evolved to read language - written by a neuroscientist. "Computer scientists use the term 'open architecture' to describe a system that is versitile enough to change - or rearrange - to accommodate the varying demands on it," writes Wolf. "Our brain presents a beautiful example of open architecture."

6. Little Heathens: Hard Times and High Spirits on an Iowa Farm During the Great Depression, by Mildred Armstrong Kalish. After I read about this book on the New York Times top ten list of 2007 I really wanted to read it. I love love love memoirs and books about the depression, and a book by someone named Mildred has to be good.

7. Wizard: The Life and Times of Nikola Tesla, by Marc J. Seifer. Oh Tesla, you are so weird and fascinating. You only do things in multiples of threes and hate women's earrings, but I can't stop reading about you. Sadly, this book looks pretty thick - I don't know if I'll be able to get through it before I have to return it.